Welcome to the Wheel of Misfortune! Watch as our wildly enthusiastic contestant, Billy Bob, steps up to the wheel with more excitement than we’ve ever seen. The poor guy was practically vibrating with anticipation… until the wheel started spinning. Unfortunately for Billy Bob, luck was nowhere to be found. He never once landed on “mercy.” Instead, he got absolutely hammered with vicious kicks and knees from two merciless goddesses in stunning green dresses. But maybe… just maybe… that makes him the luckiest man alive. After all, how many men will ever experience the privilege of having their worthless balls completely destroyed by Maria and I? Feeling our powerful legs swing with perfect precision while we laugh at his agony… that’s more purpose and meaning than most men could ever dream of having. So... who’s brave enough to be our next contestant?